Waking the Dead Part 8

        In this battle called life we have all been wounded, but something much deeper has occurred than just wounds.  At some point or another I’m sure we have all felt like part of you wants to do something, but the other part doesn’t.  Part of me just wants to sit back in a service and not get involved while another part of me knows God has called me to be a leader and help run a service.  Part of me wants to dive into a relationship, but another part of me thinks that I’ll get hurt.  Don’t we all feel like a house divided sometimes?  I think we’ve just assumed all that stuff is our battle with “the flesh.”  While a lot of it is, there are places and emotions that we cannot seem to move beyond.  Everything is going along just fine, and then boom.  Something will suddenly bring you to tears or make you furious, depressed, or anxious and you cannot explain why.  It’s because we are not wholehearted.

                When Isaiah promised that the Messiah came to heal the brokenhearted, he was not speaking metaphorically.    Jesus came to heal our broken hearts because we have been damaged.  For some people this is really easy to admit and for others it would take some courage to admit they’ve been damaged.  I guarantee you there is something from your past that still haunts your memory and you wish would’ve never happened.  Whatever may have occurred, it influences your actions now in some way.  Even though we are a screwed up mess, God still loves us and is there to comfort us.  He can heal our broken heart.

                “For this people’s heart has become calloused; they hardly hear with their ears, and they have closed their eyes.  Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts and turn, and I would heal them.”  Matthew 13:15 This is a bit different from “I would forgive them” or “I would give them a place in heaven.”  Jesus offers true healing, the kind that cracks more than just the surface into our true selves.  (See Ps. 23:1-3, Ps. 147:3, Jer. 17:14, Mal. 4:2, and Luke 9:11 for more verses about healing) Recent Christianity seems to have forgotten that Jesus came to not only save us, but to heal us as we are now.  So right now, whatever you are doing, I want you to stop.  Stop and think for a moment on the fact that Jesus came to heal your heart.  How does that make you feel?

                The awesome power of God knows where the frightened places in our hearts are and He came to mend those rifts.  He brings His comfort and mercy to those times and places where we suffered the shattering blow.  God doesn’t force His way into our hearts, we have to let Him in.  “Behold, I stand at the door and knock.” Revelations 3:20 He’s there knocking. “Will you let me heal you?”  The work of Christ in healing the soul is a deep mystery, more amazing than any open-heart surgery.  I’ve heard it described-and I love this description-that Christ is “holding the broken parts of my heart in his hands, and bringing them all together, holding them tenderly until his life brought a wholeness or a oneness to what was many pieces.”  Christ puts our hearts back together including the pieces that have been broken off by tragedy or assault.  It all starts with a  simple, yet earnest prayer: “Jesus, I want my whole heart back.”

                Walking with God leads to receiving his intimate counsel, and counseling leads to deep restoration.  As we learn to walk with God and hear his voice he is able to bring up issues in our hearts that need speaking to.  Some of these wounds were enough to break our hearts, create a rift in the soul, and so we need his healing as well.  This can be done with the help of another person who can listen and pray with us or Jesus can lead us to a quiet place, to restore our soul.  In order to get to this quiet place we have to unplug from everything.  We need time in the presence of God.  “Teach me your way, O Lord, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.  I will praise you, O Lord my God, with all my heart; I will glorify your name forever.” Psalms 86:11-12 When we are in the presence of God, removed from distractions, we are able to hear him more clearly and He can open these broken places in our hearts and begin to heal us.

                In our own lives we have mishandled these places in our hearts far too often.  We push them down with something that will bring us comfort besides God’s healing.  That’s where his forgiveness comes in.  “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9 Our sins give the Enemy a certain claim on our lives and when we renounce our sins, we are renouncing this claim.  “This often comes in the form of “agreements”-Satan has suggested something to us, and we have said, “Yes.”  He might have said, Don’t ever trust anyone, or Your heart is bad-never show it to anyone, or You are dirty…lustful…addicted and never will get free.”  Whatever we have agreed with, we must renounce those agreements because it is not the real us. 

We have been cleansed on the cross and the Enemy should flee from us.  How’s that a picture for you?  How long have we thought about fleeing from temptation and the things that we’re surrounded with constantly.  We should pray that the Enemy would flee from us.  “Submit yourselves, then, to God.  Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” James 4:7  Then we should ask Him to put back the pieces of our heart together.  Our job is to listen and follow where He is leading and welcome that part of our heart back.  You know the part that you sent away?  The part of yourself the Enemy convinced you was no good?  We should welcome back the despised, forsaken part just as Jesus embraces it.

Brokenness is what keeps so many people from walking the path that God has in store for them.  As long as we have unhealed places within us, these rifts in our soul, we will find it next to impossible to live in freedom and victory.  No matter how disciplined you think you are, unless God heals these places in your heart, it will not work.  Without the healing of God and his deep restoration, Christians will never live a life fully alive.  Maybe you’ve been trying to live your life giving 95% to God and there’s still some part of you that is broken and needs healing.  If that’s the case, don’t wait another moment to give it up.  Get alone from society and spend some time with God.  Pray, earnestly, for your whole heart back because this isn’t a battle for the weak of heart.  The time for relying on ourselves and doctrine is the past.  We need intimacy with God and our whole hearts.  If there is any prayer requests you have don’t hesitate to let me know.  My next blog won’t come till after Christmas so Merry Christmas!

In Love,

Bill 

Waking the Dead Part 7

               The Chronicles of Narnia by C. S. Lewis is an awesome series, mainly because Lewis is such an awesome author with an incredible testimony.  In The Horse and His Boy, Shasta is walking in darkness and can hear the breathing of something right behind him.  This turns out to be a lion, Aslan, and when Shasta learns that it was a lion he starts freaking out.  The Voice speaks to him and tells Shasta that all of the lions he had been seeing were just him.  Shasta gets mad at Aslan for all the crap he had to go through with him around and blamed him as the cause of it.  Aslan then goes on to explain how it was because of him and his presence that Shasta was even alive still.  It’s an awesome picture if you think about it.  Shasta is walking in darkness and all he can feel/hear is the breathing of this lion on him.  This same lion is there protecting and watching over him, doing things that Shasta can’t comprehend at the time.  This has to be one of the best pictures of God that I’ve read.

                Everybody has their own story with their own struggles, fears, dreams, hopes, and failures.  What if we had this image of God, standing right beside us, breathing down our necks saying, “Tell me your sorrows.”  One of the many reasons why God is awesome is because He’s a Counselor.  If you told some of your friends they need a counselor, they might get offended.  (I do not recommend doing so) I’m not afraid to admit that I need this Counselor though.  Life is hard sometimes and it sucks.  We hold on to the purpose of our Christian life which is that our hearts can be restored and set free.  Restoring our hearts if far from easy though and it will be a process, a process with much counseling needed. 

                We’re told to “Trust in the Lord with all your heart…” (Proverbs 3:5) but we find that one of the hardest things to do.  I know I don’t trust other people easily, not with important stuff anyways.  It seems like it’s second nature to worry about things.  And loving others deeply, how often does that happen?  We get angry at, resentful, or indifferent to the people we once loved.  We can overcome these things with our new, good heart though.  “For it is with your heart that you believe…” Romans 10:10 Our deepest convictions, the ones that truly shape our lives, come from our hearts.

                God wants to walk beside us through our deepest hurts.  I personally have had an incredibly easy and blessed childhood but I know many Christians who have had otherwise and they still feel pain from that.  The pain from their childhood may still be there under the surface and you know what?  We keep blaming ourselves for the mistakes from our past.  It’s a huge weight that we’ll never be truly able to let go of unless we give it up to God.  It wasn’t entirely our fault in the first place, the Enemy is set against us.  He was hell-bent on keeping you from the Truth and now that you know the Truth he wants to convince you that you are no good because of your past.  He wants to tell you that you are no good and it is all your fault.  Even in a crappy situation like that, we have our Counselor standing beside us, guiding us, and whispering, “You are good because I have made you good.  This is not your fault.” 

                Peter was known as one of Jesus’ closest friends.  He had special experiences with Him all throughout the Bible.  I can only imagine how bad he felt after denying Christ 3 times.  It must have been devastating for Peter.  When Jesus and Peter are reunited after the Resurrection, Jesus asks Peter 3 times if he loves Him.  Peter is hurt by the questions, but Jesus makes His point.  If Jesus left the matter unaddressed then Peter would have felt doubt or shame every time he preached the Gospel or a nagging guilt every time he prayed.  It would have been easier to put the whole situation behind him.  Denial is a form of coping for many Christians, but not with Jesus.  He wants our lives to be full of truth, and to get it to that point he’s got to take us into our inmost being.   The things that hurt us most in life are often invitations to go into this place with God and hear what He has to say.  This is another way of not just knowing, but experiencing that your heart is good and matters to God.  Whenever a situation brings you to your knees and you think it’s all your fault, ask God to show you that you’re good.

                God is not only the Counselor.  He puts people in our lives to help counsel us as well.  I used to think for the longest time that nobody really cared to hear about my problems because everybody has them.  I would share mundane things, but not the real me with people because frankly it’s a bit unnerving to fully expose yourself.  That’s all changed though.  It’s not emotionally healthy to keep everything bottled up inside and God has put people in our lives to help counsel us as well.  That might be a close friend or an adult who you admire or somebody else for all I know.  In every great story, the hero or heroine had someone older or wiser they could turn to though.  Neo had Morpheus, Dorothy had the Wizard, Frodo had Gandalf, and Harry had Dumbledore.  God did not create us to face life alone.  He is there and I bet someone else in your life would be willing to fight right along-side you as well.

                Maybe the world has been wrong about you or you have believed the lie that you are no good.  You matter to God deeply and you are good!  You are more than likely going to screw up at some point, but God is there counseling and guiding us through life.  We just have to continue fighting the lies the Enemy tries to put in front of us and listen to Truth.  My prayer is that you rely on God for counseling because there is no one who is a greater comfort.  I seriously wouldn’t be able to make it through a day without it.  If you have anything you would like me to pray for just let me know.

In Love,

Bill Bouillon